Tom Hanks Talks About Fatherhood And The Lessons He Learned From His Children

American actor and filmmaker Tom Hanks recently opened up about his parenting style and how it differed from the way he was brought up by his "preoccupied" parents.On the latest episode of On Purpose with Jay Shetty, Hanks talked about growing up with divorced parents and how it affected him when he was raising his four children.Hanks shares son Colin Hanks, 49' daughter Elizabeth Hanks, 42, with his first wife, Samantha Lewes and Chet Hanks, 34, and Truman Hanks, 28, with his longtime wife Rita Wilson.

Preoccupied Parents"My parents were very preoccupied with the positives and miseries of their lives,” Hanks, the third out of four siblings, told host Jay Shetty. “I like to joke that they pioneered the marriage dissolution laws for the state of California...My home environment was fluid in that we moved a lot. And we were suddenly living with a whole different set of people because my parents got remarried and whatnot. By the time I was seven, I had lived in eight different homes. By the time I was 10, I lived in ten different homes," he said.When Shetty asked if he parents his children differently, Hanks said that he tries to. "I try to, but I made every mistake. You know, you scar the kids somehow in the same exact way,” he said. “And as they get older, you come back around and (say), ‘Hey, can I talk about what a knothead I was with you for all those years?’ And (they say), ‘Yeah, sure, dad. Yeah, I’ve been kind of waiting for this. Why don’t you unload.’”"But I would say at the same time... does it come up to be 50-50? Maybe the attitude and the life that we led. The laughs, that stuff’s worth its weight in gem-encrusted gold,” he said.Also Read: What He Learned From His ChildrenShetty also asked Hanks if in the process of parenting, he learned something from his children, to which Hanks said, "How different they all are. They are not the same type of human being ever."He also recalled a story of his youngest son Truman Hanks that made him "feel good" about his role as a father and fatherhood in general."He was younger. He was like seven or eight. I said, 'Oh, at one point, let’s go down — we were in New York — let’s go down to the park and we’ll take our gloves, we’ll throw it around. We’ll bat the balls. We’ll just find a place (on the) grass.’ And (he) said, ‘OK, let’s do that.’" However, shares Hanks that he got busy and the park outing together never happened. When he realised, he asked for forgiveness from his son, who said, "No that's OK, dude." However, shared Hanks, his son sounded disappointed.Hanks apologised and said that he didn't want his son to feel bored, to which, the kid replied, "Dad, I am never bored." "And that... speaks to curiosity and drive and also the comfort of where one is in order to feel free in order to explore whatever world that is," shared Hanks. He learned that children have the ability to pursue their own interests without being prodded or forced to. RetrospectionHanks earlier also shared about the different ways his older children grew up then his sons with Wilson.In an interview to New York Times, 2019, he said: "I start thinking about mistakes I made with my own kids and not explaining things or not being there for them. Or being so preoccupied with other things that are going on in our adult world."Speaking of how they grew up differently as a result of his career, he said, "My son Colin was born when I was very young. As well as my daughter, but that means we have this gestalt understanding because they remember when their dad was just a guy trying to, you know, make the rent. My other kids, they were born after I had established a beachhead in every way. And so their lives were just different."